NLP Meta Model
We all have our own map of the world. This map is made with lost information as people distort, delete and generalise information.
The meta model is tool for practitioners to help a client to recover lost information which reconfigures their map.
Generalisations
Universal Qualifiers – used when people feel stuck. They imply there is no exception to their experience. Listen for “always, never, every, all, everyone, no-one, everything, nothing”
Client statement – “I’m always depressed Always?”
Practitioners meta model questions:
- Even in the shower?
- You laughed earlier today, you didn’t seem depressed then.
Client statement – “Everyone hates me?”
Practitioners meta model questions:
- Everyone?
- What about your new wife?
Model Operators – something is require or not required to happen Listen for “can, can’t, possible, impossible, should, shouldn’t, will, won’t, may, may not”
Client Statement – “I cant get started in the morning”
Practitioners meta model questions:
- So, your trying to say that you have never be able to get started in the morning?
- What would happen if you did get started?
- What prevents you from getting started?
Deletions
Simple Deletions – information is left out
Client statement “The other one is better”
Practitioners meta model questions:
- Better than what?
Client statement “I have learnt a lot”
Practitioners meta model questions:
- What specifically have you learnt?
Unspecified Verbs (the doing part of the sentence) – the lack of information allows others to fill the gap (mind reading) Ask who/how/what specifically
Client statement “I can deal with it.”
Practitioners meta model questions:
- How specifically?
Client statement “My friend hurt me”
- How did your friend hurt you?
Nominalizations – turned a process into a verb Ask yourself – can I put in a box
Client statement “There is no respect here.”
Practitioners meta model questions:
- Who is not respecting whom?
Client statement “My relationship is in trouble”
Practitioners meta model questions:
- How is the way you are relating causing you trouble?
Distortions
Cause — Effect – A caused B Listen for “if, then, makes, drive, compels”
Client statement “My family makes me mad.”
Practitioners meta model questions:
- How do they make you mad?
Client statement “Her refusal to listen really makes me sad.”
- How does her refusal make you sad?
Client statement “I feel bad for making her cry.”
Practitioners meta model questions:
- What did you do that you believed made her cry?
Complex Equivalence A means B Listen for “means, therefore, implies, must”
Client statement “His e-mail was brief he must be angry”
Practitioners meta model questions:
- How does a short e-mail mean that he is angry?
Client statement “The way he looks at me means he mistrust me”
Practitioners meta model questions:
- Does he ever look like that when he is trusting?
Mind Reading – claiming to know what the other person thinks
Client statement “I know what makes him happy.”
Practitioners meta model questions:
- How do you know…?
Client statement “He should know better.”
Practitioners meta model questions:
- How should he know not to do that?
Client statement “I’m sorry to keep annoying you.”
Practitioners meta model questions:
- How do you know that you are annoying me?
Lost Performative – a value judgment is made without stating who has made the judgment
Client statement “It’s right that people should know.”
Practitioners meta model questions:
- For whom is it true that people…?
Client statement “Failure is a necessary part of the system.”
Practitioners meta model questions:
- Necessary for whom? Who says it is?
Client statement “That is a stupid thing to say.”
Practitioners meta model questions:
- That is stupid according to whom?
Client statement “Oh, it is not important anyway.”
Practitioners meta model questions:
- It is not important to whom?
Client statement “It is not good to be strict.”
Practitioners meta model questions:
- Not good for whom?
Chris Delaney NLP Life Coach, Hypnotherapist and Career Advisor is available for booking for One to One Private Sessions, Group Training Sessions and Public Speaking Events
Chris Delaney is also a published author “The 73 Rules of Influencing the Interview – using Psychology, NLP and Hypnotic Persuasion Techniques”
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