The Bruce Lee Principle to Boost Your Self-Esteem
What is Self-Esteem
Self-esteem in a nutshell is the attitude and judgement towards oneself. If you have poor self- esteem, effectively you will have negative thoughts and beliefs about yourself. On the other hand if you were to have a strong self-esteem effectively your thoughts and beliefs will certainly be positive.
When you are left alone in public, maybe waiting for your bus or to meet a friend. What do you do? Take your mobile phone out scroll through text messages that have already been read or see what’s going on our social media.
Why is it that we feel urged to check our mobile phones when left alone in social situations or in public? While one can argue that they do this purely to kill time however people do this simply because they are afraid of being judged.
There are so many examples we can look at, however they all boil down to the same reason.
Here are 3 insights into boosting your self esteem.
Bruce Lee’s principle
Avoid a dependency on validation from others.
“I am not in this world to live up to your expectations and you’re not in this world to live up to mine” – Bruce Lee
Very simple isn’t it! You set a certain standard for yourself and you live up to it.
Having mentioned that, you must bear in mind the important people in your life that may look up to you or you look up to them. These people can be your parents, siblings, partner, children or even your boss. Other than these few exceptions there is absolutely no need to worry about impressing random people at the bar, restaurant, train station or where ever it may be.
So the next time you are out alone in public challenge yourself. Don’t pick up the phone, don’t be afraid of being judged. You will soon come to the understanding that being alone socially or in public has no negative consequences whatsoever.
Stop Mind Reading
Let’s get this straight once and for all. You can never read someone else’s mind. It may seem too obvious to point out but the amount of times we worry about what other people think is staggering.
Let say you dressed up in your best outfit and went out to a party. People at the party may think
‘Oh wow now that is a very good attire for this party’
‘That outfit looks horrible! I wonder what he/she was thinking’
‘I better go home soon before it gets too late; I have got an early start tomorrow’.
Any one of million other things.
What needs to be understood is people can be thinking about anything. You can never read someone else’s mind so you would never really know. Even if you did it doesn’t matter does it? Remember Bruce Lee’s principle! Furthermore people have their own problems to worry about.
A Question to Ask Yourself
This is a very simple exercise that can be carried out by anyone at anytime. You can have an attempt at this now, ready? Here we go.
There is a good chance you will either be reading this on your computer, tablet or mobile phone so sit back into your chair or stand in a comfortable steady stance.
Close your eyes and start taking a few deep breaths. With each deep breath you are going to feel more and more relaxed.
Now I want you to ask yourself this question “What problem do I have right now?”
I bet you are getting to get all kinds of problems in your mind right now.
- “I have to pay the bills”,
- “I have to sort this out sort that out”,
- “I don’t know what to wear for work tomorrow”
But no, that is not what I am asking you. “What problem do I have right now?” Right now at this very moment what problem do you have?
Once you have understood the essence of this question, that’s it. You’ve cracked it. We get far too carried away of what happened in the past or what is going to happen in the future. All we experience and have control over is the present. It’s all about living in the moment.
To Wrap Things Up
- Remember what Bruce Lee said?
- Stop minding reading
- Ask yourself that simple question
Chirathu Liyanage – Public speaker and Blogger with a passion for self development, aspiring to help people in life.
Chris Delaney NLP Life Coach, Hypnotherapist and Career Advisor is available for booking for One to One Private Sessions, Group Training Sessions and Public Speaking Events
Chris Delaney is also a published author “The 73 Rules of Influencing the Interview – using Psychology, NLP and Hypnotic Persuasion Techniques”
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