NLP Life Coaching and Hypnotherapy

Posts tagged ‘coach’

The Inspriational Tiffany Kay

The Inspirational Tiffany Kay

I am really excited to have the opportunity to interview  Tiffany Kay  www.tiffanykay.com. Tiffany is well known in the coaching world, as a highly successful and inspirational coach, presenter and author.

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C. Hi Tiffany and thank you for joining me. In coaching circles you are well known and your repetition proceeds you, can you let any reader who are new to the world of coaching a little bit more about you.

T. I grew up in Liverpool in a high achieving family – my father was a high-court judge and my brother excelled at rugby (culminating in being a member of the world-cup winning team). It seemed as though the rest of my family knew what they wanted to do but I never had that clarity. I did have a fascination with psychology and philosophy. When I was about 10 years old I remember asking my school friends why they thought we were here — I think they thought I meant the playground but I was talking about life!

The question stayed with me as I wandered rather aimlessly through the years. I cared deeply about what people were thinking and feeling and how they were finding meaning in their lives yet I struggled to find a career that fitted my skills. I went from sales to administration before ending up in a training position at Littlewoods. I found myself working with colleagues 1-1 in the business and my passion for coaching began.

Many of the conversations strayed from business issues to the problems they were having in their personal lives and this was where I felt I could make the biggest difference. This was in 2000 and ‘Life coaching’ wasn’t that well known in the UK but I read up about it on the Internet and felt that I had finally found what I wanted to do.

In 2002, full of enthusiasm but rather naively, I quit my corporate job to be a full-time coach and I have been working for myself ever since.

The first few years were really tough and I supplemented my income with associate trainer work. Later I partnered up with a good friend, Kate Trafford and set up a training company called Go Beyond NLP. We ran certification courses In NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming, Hypnotherapy and Coaching). We stopped trading in 2011 so that we both had the time and space to focus on our individual offerings again.

For the last few years, my coaching work has centred around supporting people to live inspired lives.  The greatest gift I can give my clients is creating dramatic perceptual shifts enabling them to see situations and challenges very differently. I truly believe that everyone already has the inner resources and wisdom to resolve every problem they encounter. I see my role as helping the client to access those resources faster and more easily.

I have an extensive toolkit that includes NLP, Hypnotherapy, Emotional Freedom Technique and more but after coaching for as long as I have, it is much more likely that I will use unique techniques with each client – after all, we are all different and so each intervention/process will be different too.

Currently I specialise in helping clients to move from a life of pursuit to one of presence. So many people are caught up in the rat race and lack the time or space to appreciate their lives. Presence is about being able to live in this moment without worrying about the future or fretting about past events. I believe there is a simpler and more fulfilling way to live and I love to help people discover that for themselves.

I also help other solopreneurs/coaches to build their online presence, get clear about their message and share their gifts with the world

 

 

C. That’s quite a back story, so many coaches go through that hard decision of whether or not to quit their job to become a full time coach, especially back in 2002 when coaching was relatively unknown. You have been a coach in many settings, what do you consider is the main benefit from a coaching session?

T. When I first started out, I was having some business cards printed and the man serving me asked what I did. I explained the purpose of coaching and I remember him responding “Oh so it’s for weak people with problems so big that they can’t solve them on their own”.

Obviously I didn’t do a great job of explaining it but it still makes me smile. Nothing could be further from the truth. I think coaching is often the mind-based equivalent of a good massage.  In one or two sessions, a good coach can help you to perceive situations differently, access inner and outer resources that you aren’t even aware that you have and find the best solutions to problems and challenges.

But the benefits of longer-term coaching are immeasurable. Finding and working with the right coach can enable you to find out the truth of who you are. There’s nothing like having a ‘tour-guide’ to help you to see yourself and your life more clearly – to know who you are (and who you are not), to discover your inherent and unconditional worthiness so you stop doubting yourself, to authentically and unashamedly express yourself in the world without being overly concerned with what others think and to help you know and change your own thinking and internal processes so that you are able to make decisions and solve problems effortlessly and finally find the inner peace and happiness that you truly deserve.

 

 

C. This is something I totally agree with, many people these days are to busy to take a look at themselves, to know who they are and what they want to achieve. You said that about people having “the right coach” for someone potentially looking for the right coach for them, what questions should they ask before booking a session?

T. A truly effective coaching partnership only works when the relationship is right. No one coach will be suitable for everyone so it is important to shop around and ask the right questions.

I would prioritise questions that explore the values of the coach. Conflicting values are the main reasons for failed coaching relationships. For example, if you strongly value harmony and avoid confrontation, you may not want a coach that is more challenging than supportive. I say ‘may not’ because it can be really useful to work with a coach with different values as it offers a much broader perspective – too much similarity doesn’t always make for the most personal growth. Be clear about what values you have that are absolutely essential for the coaching relationship and where there is more flexibility. Usually the context will determine which values you place the most importance on – they are likely to be very different for a therapeutic issue compared to a business situation, for example.

Find out what areas the coach specialises in. Ask them what previous experience they have in your context. I think getting a case-study answer is much more valuable than asking for a list of qualifications. They can give you examples of the types of approaches and interventions they use and how clients got to their outcomes. Obviously confidentiality is key to coaching so don’t expect too many specific details that would make a previous client identifiable.

And of course there are the logistical questions: Where do they coach? Do they work over the phone/Skype (which can save you valuable time and money travelling)? What dates/times do they work? What do they charge? What are the cancellation terms?

When I first interact with a prospective client, I view it as a two-way interview. I know which clients I work best with and I have absolutely no qualms about referring someone to a different coach that I know would be a better fit. If I was looking for a new coach, I would be wary of any coach that tries to be all things to all people or who works too hard at convincing you that they are the right one. Any coach acting with integrity will be at ease with allowing the clients to reach their own conclusions. It is an important decision to let someone into your inner world and one that deserves your full and relaxed consideration.

Don’t allow yourself to be tied into a long-term contract before you are absolutely sure that this is the coach for you. Ask for a test run if that help you to make your decision. Don’t be pressurised into something that you are not yet convinced about.

Most of all use your intuition. Asking the right questions will help you to reach a logical and thought-out decision but more often than not, your hunch will be the most accurate guide you can have. If it all seems good on paper but it still feels off, I would walk away or at least ask for a taster session. Trust your inner guidance and you are much more likely to find the perfect coaching relationship for you.

 

C. It is always a sign of a good coach when, as you just said the coach is willing to refer a client to another coach that would be a better fit for the client. As well as being a coach you are also a publishes author,  can you tell me a little bit about your new book. 

T. The idea for my book came as a simple inspiration. I overheard a lady sharing with a friend her less than favourable horoscope for the day. Somewhat defeatedly, she had already written off the day to bad luck. Whilst I appreciate that there is a fine art to astrology, I couldn’t help but think that it was crazy to let such negative thoughts pollute the day. What if, instead, there was a source of daily inspiration to offer words of wisdom to nourish the heart and soul?

And so I wrote “JoyScope: Daily Inspiration to Nourish your Heart & Soul”. The intention? To provide an alternative to the ‘horror-scope’ which can sometimes be gloomy and fear inducing. JoyScope aims to bring a fresh and uplifting approach to life. Each day there is a message that invites you to view the world from a new perspective. I wrote JoyScope to be a ‘user-manual’ for life!

JoyScope is available to buy on Amazon or through Waterstones.

 

C. What a great idea for a book, talking about uplifting approaches to life what is your life mantra?

 T. I’m sure like most people, my mantra continues to evolve with the passing years and (hopefully) more wisdom! At this point in my life, I am acutely aware of the importance of being in the flow of life rather than opposition to it so my mantra would be something like “my version of my life is an illusion”.

This stems from the recognition that we are living from our own thoughts and perceptions and not reality itself. We take the millions of bits of data present in any given moment and choose what to pay attention to and what to ignore. Sometimes that will seem to work for us and we think life is going to plan. Other times we perceive life as challenging, difficult or frustrating but that is only because of how we are choosing to filter it.

When we stop trying to make life fit our expectations and release the need for conditions to be a certain way in order to feel happy, we move back into the natural flow of life and everything becomes simpler and more peaceful once more.

I have learnt that any time I am experiencing an issue, I don’t need to focus on resolving the problem, rather that I need to question my thinking, realise that it is simply an illusion and ask what will bring me back into my flow. If we look to nature, we can see that life knows how to auto-balance. Learning to step back and allow rather than dive in and take action can be powerfully transformative. The path of non-action is vastly under-rated!

 

C. Being able to change the direction of your thinking so you can ask you said get back in your flow, is so powerful and when I learnt this, it changed the way I lived my life. Coaches always talk about goal setting, why is goal setting so important?

T. At the risk of being controversial, I would say that goal setting is actually much less important than perhaps we coaches think!

Just to be clear, I do believe that is valuable for everyone to have an experience of setting goals and achieving them. Living from a place of victimhood and believing that life happens to us without our influence does not create a healthy and happy person.

So what I am about to say comes from the assumption that most people do know they have some influence over their environment and have a sense of empowerment. If so, I would invite people to go beyond goals!

The problem with traditional goal-setting is that is presupposes that we have more control than we actually have. Let’s say that I decide to set a goal to earn £20,000 more a year. Perhaps I come up with a well thought out plan for how I will achieve that result. I will probably break it down into manageable milestones. I may even map out the tactics that I can deploy to make it happen.

Most goals assume that we can make things happen. Going back to my life mantra “my version of life is an illusion”, perhaps we can now see that we are basing our goals on a limited amount of data available to us in that moment. That data is the information we are choosing to pay attention to which is unlikely to be accurate – our own thoughts and filters bias what we perceive. Life is changing moment to moment so what we put in our plan to increase our revenue is going to be out of date before the ink is dry! And the longer term the plan the more inaccurate it is going to be.

We are likely to get attached to our goals. Life throws in a curve ball and your goal doesn’t have the capacity to accommodate it. Maybe you or a loved one gets sick and the £20,000 is now an unrealistic target. In this example, it is easy to see that a renegotiation of the goal is required but you might be surprised at the number of clients I see that are so attached to a goal that they cannot see that it is no longer relevant to who or where they are.

And what happens if I don’t achieve my goal? Either I have to redefine it or I will be left feeling disappointed. It is very difficult to feel satisfied with a £10,000 increase when the goal was twice that. Goals also set up what is known as the “I’ll be happy when” pattern (e.g. I’ll be happy when I am earning more money, I’ll be happy when I move jobs, I’ll be happy when I am in a relationship etc). Inadvertently, the goal becomes the very thing that stops us from feeling happy now. In other words, we postpone feeling happy until we have reached the achievement of our goal.

The work I do with my clients has very little requirement for goal-setting. Of course, I will always ask my clients what their outcome is for coaching but I always make sure that any goals are fluid and flexible and can respond to the twists and turns of life as it happens.

I am coaching a number of clients wishing to be in long-term relationships. Even with the best will in the world (and deploying every law of attraction technique available!), you can’t just make a fulfilling relationship happen. There are too many internal and external factors, many of which can’t be controlled. But you can create a wonderful inner relationship that brings a deep sense of personal fulfilment – the relationship between you and YOU is one of the only areas we do have full control. And of course, it makes sense that the happier and more content you are, the more likely it is that you will attract a partner. You just don’t want to set up an all or nothing goal.

So I always invite my clients to have dreams rather than goals. This allows them to live closer to the present moment rather than going out into the future and demanding that life conforms to their expectations and ideals. Life will never be exactly as we plan and wishing it to be different is the source of all of our suffering and unhappiness. Opportunities will still come our way. In fact, it will seem as though there are more than before because we notice them rather than being distracted by our own plans.  Rather than having to predict the future, when we stay connected to what is happening right here, right now we get to witness the magnificence of life unfolding before us. It really is the simplest way to live.

 

C. Tiffany it has been a pleasure to meet you, thank you for joining me today. 

tiffiny

Tiffany Kay Bio:

Tiffany Kay is a transformational coach, inspirational speaker and the creator of Living an Inspired Life. After flat-lining through the early part of life, Tiffany faced a time of awakening that transformed her life. Following her son’s life-saving heart surgery, she realised that life matters and made a deliberate and conscious decision to make her life a life that counted. Since then she has been inspiring others to be the best that they can be.

In addition to offering her products and programmes, Tiffany also mentors other trainers, coaches, entrepreneurs and how-to information providers to help them to effectively create, develop, package and promote their expertise.  A certified trainer of NLP, Humanistic NLP, Hypnotherapy and Coaching, she has over ten years experience working as an independent coach and consultant. She knows what it takes to be a successful solopreneur and relishes the opportunity to share her expertise.

Tiffany is also the author of “JoyScope” – a book and blog with daily inspirations to feed the soul!

Website is www.tiffanykay.com, Facebook page is www.facebook.com/tiffanykayfan
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The John Donaldson Interview

The John Donaldson Interview

This weeks interview is with my friend, mentor  and the founder of Positive Input http://www.positive-input.org/home In 2005 he launched a social enterprise – Positive Input as a life principles and skills learning facility using the power of the web.

 

john donalson

C. Hi John it is great to see you again.   For people who don’t know you, can you tell our readers a little about yourself?

J. My name is John Donaldson  and I run the Coach support Service

C. The coaching support service is a service for coaches and practitioners, to guide and support them. as most coaches work alone being part of a coaching network can be highly beneficial  both personally and professionally. I know you are also an author of several books and you will be shortly releasing a new book, can you tell me a little more about it?

J. My book is being written to provide information, guidance and hope to new and struggling coaches to make the break through to become economically viable and fulfilled in their work.

C. I think this a book like this is needed, so many new coaches believe they will set up a website and within a week make thousands of pounds. Is the book designed just for coaches?

J. The book is for Coaches, Therapists, NLP Practitioners and others in one to one helping professions.

C. How does your book empower coaches?

J. By living the orientations about the reality, resources and process of becoming a successful business.

C. I agree, coaches need to learn about the process of businesses as well as knowing how to support their clients  So many great coaches are unsuccessful because they don’t understand how the processes of businesses. What made you choose coaching and becoming an author as a profession?

J. Widespread disappointment and demoralisation

C. When you look back over your career, what is your greatest success with a client?

J. Encouraging Chris Delaney to develop his business and publish his book

C. And it is much appreciated. This is one reason why this book is going to be a success and the reason I want to recommend all coaches to buy this book, is because I know first hand how powerful your advice and knowledge is.  As I look up to you, which coaches and authors do you look up to? 

J. Peter Thomson, Nick James, Daniel Wagner,

C. Peter Thomson is fantastic  I think it was you who first put me on to him. Coaches is big at the moment, why do you believe coaching is important to people from all walks of life?

J. Because so many people are without direction or purpose in living their lives.

C. Yes people feel lost, they tend to have several ideas but cant choose which way to go. From your experience what do you consider is the main benefit from a coaching session?

J. To help you find the answers within yourself.

C. I know you have a coach yourself, and this is something you recommend to new coaches, how does your coach help you?

J.  They keep me focussed and on track

C. Thinking about your personal coach, has being coached changed your life?

J. Yes

C. As a coach, what is your area of expertise?

J. Business Coaching

C. The career title “coach” has different connotations, how do your friends react when they find out your a life coach and author?

J. There generally Impressed

C. That’s good. What is your life mantra?

J. Helping the helpers

C. You have achieved so many wonderful things in your life and career so far. You always have a new goal each time I meet you, why is goal setting so important?

J. If you don’t know where you are going, you won’t know which path to take.

C. Yes, I think goals keep you focused and motivated. What do you consider is the difference between negative and positive goal setting?

J. Away and towards motivation

C. For those that aren’t familiar with away and towards motivated, its the pain or pleasure motivated. Some people are motivated to achieving pleasure or from getting away from pain.  What was your greatest goal you set for yourself? Did you achieve it?

J. To see the CSS stand on its own feet financially and repay me my loans, the to go back to ultimate love which is writing.

C. Thank you for joining me today John and good luck with your new book. The final question I would like to ask you today is where do you see yourself in the nest 3-4 years?

J. Hanging in there in a bigger and better game.

John Donaldson Bio

john donalson

After ten years corporate career in marketing and general management, John was one of the founders of Pluswork Ltd.

He moved to Non-Executive Chairman of the Pluswork Group in his forties.

He then took up writng and publishing books and periodicals on better handling of money and time management, communication and other life skills.

He has run various voluntary support groups helping people to handle their stress issues and become more effective in life.

In 2005 he launched a social enterprise called Positive Input as a life principles and skills learning facility using the power of the web.

In 2012 he extended this activity into supporting the Coaches, Therapists and NLP Practitioners who will ultimately be helping the learners who come Positive Input to take better control of their lives.

John Donaldson – johnd@positive-input.org & johnd@coachsupportservice.org

Specialities: Mentoring, Tutoring, Deal Making, Inspiring, Wordsmith and Author.
Other People Who Read This Article Also Read:

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Train to Be a life Coach and Make Money as a part time or full time Coach

 

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Peter Freeth an International Coach and Presenter

Peter Freeth an International Coach and Presenter 

I am joined this week by coach, author and business leader Peter Freeth www.askrevelation.com . Peter has a world wide reputation, presenting at intentional conferences in Ukraine, Poland, Denmark, USA, Canada, South Africa, Ireland and the UK. Peter has taught NLP and coaching all over the world, and has been a “guest trainer” with some of the UK’s best known training companies.

peter freeth

C. Peter thank you for joining me today, I have been looking forward to meeting and interviewing you. You have an incredible CV what was it that made you choose coaching as a profession?

P. I think it chose me, actually. I was delivering NLP training and through that, lots of people were asking me for 1:1 help with various personal and business issues. Towards the end of the 1990s, the coaching market became established, and what I was doing became known as coaching.

C. So you started as  a coach before it became a popular profession, did you believe that you would come this far, being recognised worldwide?

P. I didn’t have a goal or destination in mind, actually, I just wanted to do something that I enjoyed for as long as I enjoyed it. 20 years on and I’m still enjoying it.

C. I believe that is the secret to career success finding something you enjoy and getting paid to do it. You have worked with many people, what do consider is  your greatest success with a client?

P. That depends on what you value as a measurement. Either 700% increase in profitability for a Business Unit Director, or the CEO of a conference business who recently told me that the coaching session I had with him 10 years ago changed his life and continues to make new opportunities possible for him, such as giving a great speech at his own wedding! Personally, I value the latter example, and in fact the original coaching session is used as an example in my book The NLP Practitioner Manual.

C. I agree, for many clients the coaching session has lasting affects not only for the reason they originally came for but also in other areas of their life. when working with a client how many sessions on average do clients particularly attend for?

P. That depends on the client’s needs, but my aim from the start is to make myself redundant because the last thing I want is for clients to depend on me; I get bored. I find that for a leader to make a step change in their thinking, behaviour and performance, 6 months is about right, with maybe 4 to 6 sessions over that time.

C. Do you always meet clients in the office or do you ever deliver sessions out in the open?

P. Actually I prefer busy public places. Lots of coaches complain to me that they find their work very tiring, and the reason for that, I believe, is that in a private room, the coach is having to supply all the energy. In a busy, happy, public space, there’s so much positive energy to feed off that it makes the session so much easier. I learned this many years ago by accident when I had planned to do a coaching session with a client who was terrified of public speaking in a cosy, plush, deserted hotel bar. When we arrived, the bar was closed and we were sent to the leisure club where the ladies’ aqua-aerobics session had just finished. The buzz and energy in the bar definitely made the session easier.

C. Yes the environment can make a big difference during a session. In your sessions, as well as coaching do you use other tools such as NLP or Hypnotherapy to support your clients?

P. As a coach, I don’t think you can help but use all of your skills and experiences, so yes, definitely. I would say that I don’t use either of those tool kits overtly, though, so I don’t ‘do’ NLP or hypnosis, but I do weave their principles into the conversation. For example, I might say to a client, “So, by the time you walk out of that door in an hour’s time, how do you want to feel differently about that?” In the cold light of this web page, it’s loaded with Milton language and even a linguistic timeline, but in a natural conversation, it just gets the client to think about what they want as an outcome for the session. I do conversational swishes, timelines, squashes, all sorts. I’ve actually pioneered a number of unique adaptations of NLP techniques which I know are used by many other coaches and trainers, such as doing a swish with a flipchart.

C. It must be amazing to see other professionals using the techniques you adapted and pioneered. What do you do to keep up with the latest trends in coaching?

P. I don’t. Trends are only there for someone to sell something. I only judge myself by my results as measured by my clients. I do keep up with advances in other technologies though, such as neurology, psychology, various aspects of human behaviour and so on. I think that’s much more valuable. As much as I struggle to read academic research, it’s much more valuable than the ‘latest trends’.

C. Do you attend any regular training?

P. I look for interesting events to go to. I don’t think it’s necessarily useful to keep going to coach training, I have found that coaches who do that do it for one of two reasons; either they need the CPD points, or they believe that they don’t yet know enough to be a good coach. I prefer to go to lectures, business talks and so on, anything to expand the mind. Your local university will have lots of different free events that you can go to.

C.  I agree and many techniques especially this from NLP are taken from the field of psychology. With your research coming from different fields and from the lectures you attend is their anyone in coaching sector do you look up to?

P. I don’t know anyone in the coaching sector these days. I used to go to lots of networking events and practice groups but I found them to be mostly populated by wannabe coaches looking for clients. I realised that successful coaches don’t go to such events, they’re too busy with clients! I’m also sorry to say that the people who become well known in a particular field, if they’re commercially driven, have to keep reinventing their ideas so that they can keep making money. Even academic figures are often driven by a need to be published in order to keep the research grants flowing and their centres open. I suppose I’ve never really been one for heroes. Of anyone, I look up to my father the most, but he’s not a coach as far as he knows!

C. Why do you believe coaching is important to people from all walks of life?

P. I don’t believe it’s important. I believe that access to education is important, for people who want it, and coaching is just one form of education.

C. Yes, many people want the coach to give them the answers, where in reality that isn’t what coaching is about. What would you say is the main benefit from a coaching session?

P. That the client gets something important for them that they had believed to be just out of reach.

C. Do your clients come for one off session or do you meet them on a regular basis?

P. It depends on what they want. If it’s a problem fix, I’ll do that in one session. For example, fear of public speaking is a common one, and I’d expect to have that sorted in about an hour or so at most. If it takes longer, the client starts to question too much and begins to believe that their problem must be really serious. So I treat the client with total respect, and their ‘problem’ with total disrespect

C. I like the ‘disrespecting’ of their problem and it is great to hear that you don’t drag out sessions for problems that can be sorted within an hour, you do hear about coaches who get the client to overbook sessions. For someone potentially looking for a coach, what questions should they ask before booking a session?

P. Treat it like any service; a plumber, gardener or whatever. Trust your gut reaction and ask for testimonials, but bear in mind that no coach is going to refer to a client who hated them! An acid test is to ask for a money back guarantee. If the coach says no, they can’t have a lot of faith in their skills.

C. The acid test is a great idea for potential clients. Do you have a coach yourself?

P. Not formally, but I know where to go to talk things through.

C. Has having a coach changed your life?

P. I guess so, yes, though accidentally. My partner gave me a lot of very challenging feedback when we first met, and it made me rethink the whole direction of my life. While I didn’t employ her as a coach, that’s the job that she really did. We shouldn’t think of coaches in only a one dimensional way, but instead think of the role that they play in our lives.

C. Yes we all have informal coaches who help us make choices and look at situations from different perspectives. We mention at the beginning a little about your business but what area of expertise would you say you specialise in?

P. I suppose it’s become two things. Fear of public speaking is so common and so easy to resolve that I end up doing it quite often. The more interesting area for me is modelling high performers. I’ve written a book about it, Genius at Work, which contains my full modelling methodology. In NLP terms, it’s the basis of how you create custom techniques, so whatever the client raises, I model and create a custom intervention for it. When you model lots of people, you start to see patterns of excellence which make it so much easier to coach future clients.

C. the book sounds really interesting and I’m looking forward to reading it. When your friends ask what do you do for a living, how do they react when they find out your a life coach?

P. I’m not a life coach. I’m just a friend. One of the worst things that coaches do is to fail to turn off the coach at 5 o’clock.

C. Yes, it’s very easy to be that annoying person who wants to solve everyone’s problems even when they don’t want them solving. Has being a coach benefited you personally? How?

P. It’s given me a varied and interesting career.

C. You mentioned your recently released a book Genius at Work , can you tell me a little bit about it

P. Genius at Work is a methodology for modelling high performance. The book takes you right through all the basic principles and the most up to date research in brain function, so for example it finally explains how learning and ‘anchoring’ work without the mumbo-jumbo explanations of many NLP and coaching books. By following the book, you’ll be able to identify high performers, extract the essence of their talents and turn the model into a template for pretty much anything. I used it to create a custom coaching program for a well known engineering company, a graduate program for a high street retailer, a development program for an industry regulator and so on. And of course, I use it almost every day to learn really useful and interesting tricks from people who I meet. One of the problems that I see most often in corporate training is the use of ‘rituals’ and ‘incantations’. A ritual is a sequence of actions which is designed to bring about a certain result, a common example being the sales manager who believes that if his team just did what he does, they would be as fantastic as he is. An incantation is a script, a magic spell which is sure to get a certain result, so if a store assistant asks you, in a dreary, deadpan voice tone, “Can I interest you in one of our fantastic special offers today?” you’re supposed to fall over yourself to part with your hard earned cash. The high performing sales people who were observed to create these scripts didn’t actually say those words, they adapted their interaction for each customer. They didn’t have a script, but they did have an underlying, consistent way of thinking about their behaviour and results, and that’s what you can get at using Genius at Work, so you end up with people who say something slightly different to each customer but usually get the same, positive result. The script is easier for corporates to teach – or at least they think it is – but it’s really counter-productive. When we model high performers, we find the same common traits coming up, every time, in every walk of life or skill set. They under-rate their own skills, they make it look easy and they can’t explain how they do it. The Genius at Work approach enables you to get underneath that and unlock the real secrets of their success.

C. The book sounds really interesting I hop it does well. When your coaching your clients do you coach people in groups or just on a one to one basis?

P. Both I suppose. 1:1 work looks more like coaching, but when I’m training a group and one person raises a personal issue, I use it to coach the whole group because I know they’ll all identify with it in some way. For example, on a presentation skills course, I’ll talk to someone who is anxious about the nature of worry, which is actually just an application of our goal setting ability. Of course, everyone worries at some point, so by changing one person’s understanding of worry, the whole group benefits without having to step into the spot light and talk about their own experiences.

C. In coaching we talk about goal setting, why is goal setting so important?

P.  Oddly enough, I don’t think it is. What I mean is that we are goal directed animals, we can’t not set goals. So I don’t think it’s as important to set goals in the sense that coaches are probably familiar with, I think it’s more important to be aware of the goals that you already have for yourself and which drive you every day. Only when you’re honest about what those are can you modify them to get different results.

C. What is the difference between negative and positive goal setting?

P. I don’t think there is a difference. We’re analogue creatures, so we can’t directly think in terms of negatives, so a negative goal such as, “I don’t want to still be in this job in a year’s time”, translates into, “I want to be in this job a year from now, still feeling miserable about it”, because that’s the image that you might make in your mind when you verbalise that goal. So a goal can by definition only be something you move towards. You might be motivated away from failure, for example, but that tells you nothing about what direction to move in, so you’re likely to go from the frying pan to the fire, as they say. You really want to be in the living room watching your favourite TV show, so there’s no need to think of getting out of the frying pan, that’s just the triggering event, it’s not a goal.

C. Thank you Peter and just before we finish I wanted to ask  you what is your life mantra?

P. Life’s too short to have mantras.

C. and where do you see yourself in the nest 3-4 years?

P. I’ve been asked this question since my first job interview nearly 30 years ago, and I still can’t come up with a better answer than, “enjoying myself, somewhere”.

C. Thank you for joining me today Peter and good luck with your new book which is now available on Amazon.

peter smileLearn More about Peter Here:  Peter Freeth has almost 30 years experience in business, with first hand experience in technology, sales, management and team development. He has worked with major global corporations including HP, British Telecom, Parker Hannifin, Babcock, Mizuho, VW Audi, Barclays, Santander, Mercer and Google and delivered impressive results including doubling sales conversions, increasing profitability by 700% and accelerating the career development of 83% of Babcock’s future leaders.

Peter first encountered NLP in 1993 while working in the Telecoms industry and has been studying, developing and teaching it ever since. Over the past 20 years, Peter’s experience and work has expanded into the field of coaching and more general public and corporate training in such areas as sales and leadership.

Peter has written 9 books on various business and management subjects as well as countless magazine articles. He has presented at intentional conferences in Ukraine, Poland, Denmark, USA, Canada, South Africa, Ireland and the UK and is an expert in the field of developing high performing cultures in business.

Peter has taught NLP and coaching all over the world, and has been a “guest trainer” with some of the UK’s best known training companies. Today, Peter’s focus is on executive coaching and business performance consulting through his company, Revelation.

Learn more about peters new book here: Genius At Work
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