NLP Life Coaching and Hypnotherapy

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Is Your Brain Like a Google Search Engine?

Is Your Brain Like a Google Search Engine?

 

 

The Google Brain

 

John opened up Google and put in the search query “how can I be more confident?” within milliseconds, Google had directed John to hundreds of possible websites.

 

Your brain is like a Google search engine (but recalls information in a completely different way to Google) instead of inserting a question or query, your brain uses your 5 senses to ask how I should respond to this situation, within nanoseconds, you react.

 

David a long term fireman arrived at the burning house, once inside he and his team went to work, hosing down the fire, as they entered the kitchen, Dave’s senses came alive and fed back what they could see, feel, hear smell and taste to his brain – the senses unconsciously asked the brain how to react?

 

To find the most appropriate websites for John, Google with its clever algorithms, searches through 60 trillion webpages, these pages are then sorted by content relevant to the search query. Google use the structure of the query to help find the most relevant source; a question mark promotes Google to search for an answer to a question.

 

John quickly scanned the websites, and rather than seeing sales pages from self-help coaches, google had provided the answer to his question; a step by step guide to being more confident, an explanation of what confidence is.

 

 

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To decide how to react, your brain searches for the best frame of reference to the situation from the millions of bits of data in takes in unconsciously. A fireman sees a fire and know it’s a fire!

 

Your subconscious doesn’t just see the fire, it makes a note of all the data; the direction of the smoke, where the smoke is thickest, the temperature of the heat, the sound of the cracking fire, the materials of house, furniture and cupboards, the gas symbol on the kitchen wall, the distance between the fire truck and the burning premises, all this data is took in by the brain.

 

The kitchen was hot, too hot! There was smoke that coming in from the other rooms, the floor was warm, Dave could feel the heat from coming through his boots. Flames were burning more intensively on the left side, this is where the hose should be concentrated…”out, out, out” his shouts to his team, who respond quickly…he didn’t know why he ordered the retreat, if was just a feeling he had…

 

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Individual Searches

 

 

As the last fire officer stepped out of the kitchen, the floor clasped. Unknown to Dave and his team the fire had originated in an unidentified old cellar and had for the last couple of hours burnt through the support beams of the kitchen and weakened the concrete floor. Dave had no way of knowing the floor was going to collapse at a conscious level, but his subconscious had recognised something out of the ordinary and sent Dave an emotional warning

 

Google is becoming clever and now finds personal websites depending on your previous searches and time spent on various websites. In this, John would receive different search result for the same query then you or I.

 

 

Your brain is similar to Google; it finds personal frames of reference to answer the unconscious questions; how should I react to this situation? Dave an experience fire officer could subconsciously detect that there was a danger, he didn’t know consciously what it was, but his brain warned him.

 

All of our experiences are recorded, stored away for future use. Dave’s brain compared similar burning rooms to this one, and noticed something amiss. Just as Google finds relevant websites, blogs, videos, news articles and social media sites to answer your search query, from your previous online experiences.

 

 

 

 

 

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Chris Delaney NLP Life Coach, Hypnotherapist and Career Advisor is available for booking for One to One Private Sessions, Group Training Sessions and Public Speaking Events

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Chris Delaney is also a published author “The 73 Rules of Influencing the Interview – using Psychology, NLP and Hypnotic Persuasion Techniques”

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Other People Who Read This Article Also Read:

Chris Delaney Specialise in:

FREE Life Coaching Downloads

Sponsored Adverts

Train to Be a life Coach and Make Money as a part time or full time Coach

coaching business in a box

101 Life Coaching Tools and Techniques

101 coaching techniques

Chris Delaney NLP Life Coach, Hypnotherapist and Career Advisor is available for booking for One to One Private Sessions, Group Training Sessions and Public Speaking Events

Venues

DIDSBURY: 4 Birley Park, Didsbury, Manchester, M20 2TL

MANCHESTER: The Triangle, 37 Exchange Square, Manchester M4 3TR

E-MAIL: chrisdelaney7@gmail.com for more information

 

  • Hypnosis and Life Coaching for smoking in Didsbury
  • Hypnosis and Life Coaching for weight loss in Didsbury
  • Hypnosis and Life Coaching for fears and phobias in Didsbury
  • Hypnosis and Life Coaching for self esteem in Didsbury
  • Hypnosis and Life Coaching for anxiety in Didsbury
  • Hypnosis and Life Coaching for alcoholism in Didsbury
  • Hypnosis and Life Coaching for confidence in Didsbury
  • Hypnosis and Life Coaching for goals in Didsbury

Hypnotherapy and Life Coaching in Didsbury is easily located for people living in and around Stockport, Manchester, Tameside, Chorlton and Didsbury, as we are just off the M60

The Importance of Pain in Therapy

The Importance of Pain in Therapy

 

 

Many coaches are taught to encourage their clients to look at the positive in situations or to reframe negative goals into positive ones. And this is a key skill to support your clients to achieve their desired outcomes.

 

But before setting goals you need to motivate your client so they have a deep desire to work towards their positive goals, even during the days where things don’t go to plan.

 

In this initial stage of the session the practitioner can use pain as a motivational tool.

 

 

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Towards and Away From Motivation

 

Before your clients book a session they, in many cases, have lived with their issue for many weeks, months and in most cases years. The client hasn’t enjoyed their situation, but they had learnt to deal with the pain and put up with their problem.

 

Then at a certain point the client’s perception changes, they feel that enough is enough, the pain increases and they seek help from you, the coach, to move forward with their lives.

 

This increase in pain was the reasons the client contacted you for a session.

 

 

Motivational Pain

 

 

Pain and pleasure motivation is a flow; it rises and decreases throughout the day. The associated pain or pleasure emotion attached to the stimulus is the baseline, but often external and internal factors strengthen and weaken this, creating a flow, but the pain or pleasure baseline is a constant.

 

A client on a particular day feels an escalation in pain which creates a desire for change, but later the pain decrease back to the baseline, which the client has learnt to live with, weakening the aspiration for change.

 

If a client changes their baseline from “I can put up with this” to “I need to change my habits to get away from this pain” the client will be in a constant state of wanting to change, making achieving their goals a key priority in their life.

 

As therapist we see this daily; some clients set goals which they are committed to achieving, while others, who in the therapy session seem as keen as any other client then lose their motivation, resulting in them returning to their old habits.

 

 

 

 

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Boosting The Pain

 

When clients arrive for a change session I first check they are committed to making the change, because I don’t want them to go back to their old habits. I asked a client once “when do you want to make this change?” She replied “in about 4 months” I told her “that’s great, come back in 4 months”

 

To make a change in your lifestyle, habits and perspective you need to be fully committed now. At the session start I ask the client what has made them want to make a change? Here, I am not trying to uncover their goals, instead I want to know what stimulus/perspective caused the pain to increase to a level that made them want to change.

 

Remember the client has put up with their issue for an age, but recently something has changed that made them want to change. For some this is external they have seen someone with the same issue become worse and they don’t want the same to happen to them, others had a change of perspective and can no longer continue as they are.

 

Whatever their reason I build up this stimulus using all their senses to create a highly associated state of pain. Here I am replacing the baseline, so when they think about their stimulus, instead of feeling “It’s not too bad” or “I can put up with this for a bit longer,” the client feels a desire for change, they associate the stimulus with so much pain that they want, more than anything, to move away from the pain and to achieve their goals.

 

 

 

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Creating Change

 

With a desire to change internally associated at the subconscious level, you can move onto the pleasure – the goals and outcomes. These 2 elements pain and pleasure is a key motivational package that creates fast therapy.

 

Often clients who only focus on their goals and the pleasure they will receive as they achieve these goals, only become motivated for a short period of time before returning to their old habits. Pleasure outcomes are motivational, but the motivation isn’t strong enough alone to create fast change.

 

This is why people who want to be healthier return to smoking, drinking or eating fatty foods, this is the reason why people set goals but in quick succession stop working towards them. Many clients setting goals will start to associate pain to the work/task required to achieve these goals, and see the pleasure in their old habits and routine.

 

By creating negative association to their old habits and routine, the client will have a need to change because pain is a stronger motivator then pleasure.

Chris Delaney NLP Life Coach, Hypnotherapist and Career Advisor is available for booking for One to One Private Sessions, Group Training Sessions and Public Speaking Events

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Other People Who Read This Article Also Read:

Chris Delaney Specialise in:

FREE Life Coaching Downloads

Sponsored Adverts

Train to Be a life Coach and Make Money as a part time or full time Coach

coaching business in a box

101 Life Coaching Tools and Techniques

101 coaching techniques

Chris Delaney NLP Life Coach, Hypnotherapist and Career Advisor is available for booking for One to One Private Sessions, Group Training Sessions and Public Speaking Events

Venues

DIDSBURY: 4 Birley Park, Didsbury, Manchester, M20 2TL

MANCHESTER: The Triangle, 37 Exchange Square, Manchester M4 3TR

E-MAIL: chrisdelaney7@gmail.com for more information

 

  • Hypnosis and Life Coaching for smoking in Didsbury
  • Hypnosis and Life Coaching for weight loss in Didsbury
  • Hypnosis and Life Coaching for fears and phobias in Didsbury
  • Hypnosis and Life Coaching for self esteem in Didsbury
  • Hypnosis and Life Coaching for anxiety in Didsbury
  • Hypnosis and Life Coaching for alcoholism in Didsbury
  • Hypnosis and Life Coaching for confidence in Didsbury
  • Hypnosis and Life Coaching for goals in Didsbury

Hypnotherapy and Life Coaching in Didsbury is easily located for people living in and around Stockport, Manchester, Tameside, Chorlton and Didsbury, as we are just off the M60

Spider Phobias Manchester Hypnotherapy

Spider Phobias Manchester Hypnotherapy

 

Spider phobias are one of the most common phobias in Manchester. Research into phobias has shown how phobia genes can be passed down through DNA, this unconscious learning makes arachnophobia an easy phobia to inherit.

 

A Phobia is an associated emotional state attached to a stimulus – in arachnophobia the stimulus is a spider or the thought of a spider. Often arachnophobia starts as anxiety but quickly turns from anxiety into a phobic response. For many people arachnophobia limits their lives with some phobic’s not being able to attend a party, enter a new room first or even leave the house…encase they see a spider.

 

How Do You Remove a Spider Phobia?

 

There are many ways to get rid of a spider phobia and today I will share two techniques that I use with my hypnotherapy clients in Manchester.

 

 

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Fast Phobia Technique

 

The first technique is the “Fast Phobia Removal” Technique taken from NLP. This exercise is very powerful as it removes the associated perspective of a perceived spider.

 

When a phonic thinks of spiders they will visualise a massive, hairy, creepy, scary spider that they can see as if they are in the room, trapped with the spider. This associated image creates strong and overwhelming feelings of anxiety and fear.

 

To break this associated emotional response the NLP techniques first gets you to imagine you are in a cinema. You are then asked to imagine floating out of your body and into the projection booth, so you can watch yourself in the cinema – this creates a disassociation.

 

Next an image of you after a phobic experience when you are safe and calm comes on the cinema screen. The film of the phobic experienced in was backwards in a fast speed. As you are in the projection booth you can watch yourself watching the film (playing in reverse) creating a double dissociation.

 

As your emotion response in different as you are doubly disassociated your mind creates a new way of responding to the stimulus.

 

 

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Creating Relaxation

 

A second technique I use with spider phobias during hypnotherapy sessions in Manchester is to create a deep state of relaxation. To build this up clients are taught how to relax through breathing deeply and by visualising a relaxing place often a beach or the countryside.

 

By using all the sessions visualising the place, hearing the relaxing sounds, smelling the smells and tasting the taste all help to create a strong association of relaxation. Once this state is at its peak, I ask the client to imagine taking this state of relaxation and imagine walking over a bridge to a room in their house (where there possibly could be a spider)

 

Still feeling totally relax the client moves slowly into the room feeling calm and confident, I then start to build up the possibility of there being a spider, reminding the client to focus on their feeling of relaxation.

 

The closer the client gets to the stimulus the more relax they become, until they feel so relaxed that they can see the spider and still feel calm and confident, they can hold the spider feeling inquisitive, they can laugh, smile and enjoy the feeling of power as they look at thus small, fragile creature which is more scared of them.

 

By associating a new feeling of relaxation to the stimulus (you can only feel one emotion at a time) you create a new frame of reference (stimulus = emotion (calmness and relaxation)

 

 

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Chris Delaney NLP Life Coach, Hypnotherapist and Career Advisor is available for booking for One to One Private Sessions, Group Training Sessions and Public Speaking Events

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Other People Who Read This Article Also Read:

Chris Delaney Specialise in:

FREE Life Coaching Downloads

Sponsored Adverts

Train to Be a life Coach and Make Money as a part time or full time Coach

coaching business in a box

101 Life Coaching Tools and Techniques

101 coaching techniques

Chris Delaney NLP Life Coach, Hypnotherapist and Career Advisor is available for booking for One to One Private Sessions, Group Training Sessions and Public Speaking Events

Venues

DIDSBURY: 4 Birley Park, Didsbury, Manchester, M20 2TL

MANCHESTER: The Triangle, 37 Exchange Square, Manchester M4 3TR

E-MAIL: chrisdelaney7@gmail.com for more information

 

  • Hypnosis and Life Coaching for smoking in Didsbury
  • Hypnosis and Life Coaching for weight loss in Didsbury
  • Hypnosis and Life Coaching for fears and phobias in Didsbury
  • Hypnosis and Life Coaching for self esteem in Didsbury
  • Hypnosis and Life Coaching for anxiety in Didsbury
  • Hypnosis and Life Coaching for alcoholism in Didsbury
  • Hypnosis and Life Coaching for confidence in Didsbury
  • Hypnosis and Life Coaching for goals in Didsbury

Hypnotherapy and Life Coaching in Didsbury is easily located for people living in and around Stockport, Manchester, Tameside, Chorlton and Didsbury, as we are just off the M60

What is Your Problem Frame?

What is Your Problem Frame?

 

Everything we see, hear, smell, taste and feel is taken in by our senses through a particular frame. Your frame, which changes regularly, creates a different perception of the situation.

 

A client of mine how had a booked a relationship coaching session, was explaining to me how her husband really annoyed her; the way he walked annoyed her, the tone of his voice, the clothes he wore annoyed her, how he smiled at children’s cartoons when he thought no one was looking, it all annoyed her.

 

I asked her to imagine being her younger self, the younger her which fell in love with this man. As she was in a trance she could easily associate with this memory. I asked what she liked about this man, what made her originally fall in love. She said the way he walked, the tone of his voice, the clothes he wore, how he smiled at children’s cartoons when he thought no one was looking, she found it all adoring.

 

The same stimulus can have different meanings depending on your frame. You have probably encountered this yourself in different situations. One day you desire a particular food and another day the thought of the same food makes you feel ill, out shopping you are free with your spending, but a couple of months later you are more frugal, even though you have the same amount of spendable income. When you look in the mirror your reflection looks thin then a couple of days later you take another look and all you see is a chubby reflection, even though you haven’t lost or gained any additional weight.

 

 

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Emotional Frame of Reference.

 

Your current state affects the choice of frame you unconsciously adopt, the frame you adopt creates an emotional response. This cycle of frame and emotion can be interrupted and changed, easily.

 

 

When we access a new stimulus (smell, visual, auditory, taste, kinesthetic) our brain will quickly teach us how to react by sending an emotional response to our body; fear, happiness, anger, shock, fight or flight, etc. This system allows us to react automatically which in some situations can be live saving.

 

Our subconscious chooses the best emotional response depending on our memories. If we have been in a similar situation before we will access this memory and the associate emotional response so we act in a similar way to the previous experience. .

 

We remember the details of an event or memory as well as the emotional response, and these two factors; details and emotions are stored in different parts of our brain. If we haven’t been in this current situation before your brain, to help you to react quickly will guess at current situations by relating this situation with the best suited past memory. The famous metaphor of this is when an ex-service person hears a car back firing and re-lives the emotional experience of being at war.

 

 

 

 

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Picking Your Best Frame

 

You can see how patterns and habits are easily formed subconsciously allowing you to get on with your day, rather than having to concentrate on every new stimulus. Habits are great, especially with everyday task such as getting dressed, driving to work and feeding the cat, as these are task that no longer need your full attention.

 

You will also find, if you conscious think about your habits that you will do task in certain orders; you will get dressed in the same order (socks first, etc) drive to work following the same route without thinking about it and feed your two cats by filling the same bowl, the bowl on the left or right, up first each time. Even at work, on training courses people will sit in the same seat after break even when they have been told to sit somewhere different. Habits can form really quickly.

 

You can also pick up bad habits or allow stimuluses’ to trigger negative emotions and reactions when you want a different response. This 5 step process will allow you to break your habit, choose a new positive emotional frame , which will create a different outcome and response.

 

For this example we will use road rage. Imagine being cut up by another driver. Most people in this situation will automaticity feel angry, with some even uncharacteristically shouting and swearing at the other driver. To change your response:

 

 

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Step 1. Become aware of the stimulus that causes the emotional response (the driver cutting you up)

 

Step 2. Imagine in slow motion the stimulus and notice how the emotional response increase from nothing to full – to make this easy use a scale of 1-10, with 1 representing no emotional response and 10 the emotional peak.

 

Step 3. In slow motion, frame by frame imagine the stimulus playing out (the car getting nearer and nearer, pulling in front of you) Repeat this even slower, and check at each frame what number on the scale you are. You now know when you reach your emotional peak.

 

Step 4. Pick the frame that creates the peak and freeze this frame. Imagine while looking at this frame that you can move your emotions up and down the scale, start with the peak of the negative emotional and slowly move the emotions down the scale so the emotions weaken, and move it back up and back down again.

 

Keep looking at the stilled image as you change your emotions, giving you the control you want.

 

Step 5. Choose where on the scale you want to feel. Now take this feeling and make it stronger and stronger, and take it with you while you imagine seeing the stimulus, as if you were there now, if your emotions increase use the scale to bring them down again. Do this over and over again until you only access the emotion you desire when you think of the stimulus.

 

Because your subconscious doesn’t know the difference between real or imagined events, the unconscious mind will use your positive associated state as a trigger for the stimulus. When you next see the stimulus in real life your mind will search for a frame of reference which will be image and feeling you stored in step 5.

Chris Delaney NLP Life Coach, Hypnotherapist and Career Advisor is available for booking for One to One Private Sessions, Group Training Sessions and Public Speaking Events

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Other People Who Read This Article Also Read:

Chris Delaney Specialise in:

FREE Life Coaching Downloads

Sponsored Adverts

Train to Be a life Coach and Make Money as a part time or full time Coach

coaching business in a box

101 Life Coaching Tools and Techniques

101 coaching techniques

Chris Delaney NLP Life Coach, Hypnotherapist and Career Advisor is available for booking for One to One Private Sessions, Group Training Sessions and Public Speaking Events

Venues

DIDSBURY: 4 Birley Park, Didsbury, Manchester, M20 2TL

MANCHESTER: The Triangle, 37 Exchange Square, Manchester M4 3TR

E-MAIL: chrisdelaney7@gmail.com for more information

 

  • Hypnosis and Life Coaching for smoking in Didsbury
  • Hypnosis and Life Coaching for weight loss in Didsbury
  • Hypnosis and Life Coaching for fears and phobias in Didsbury
  • Hypnosis and Life Coaching for self esteem in Didsbury
  • Hypnosis and Life Coaching for anxiety in Didsbury
  • Hypnosis and Life Coaching for alcoholism in Didsbury
  • Hypnosis and Life Coaching for confidence in Didsbury
  • Hypnosis and Life Coaching for goals in Didsbury

Hypnotherapy and Life Coaching in Didsbury is easily located for people living in and around Stockport, Manchester, Tameside, Chorlton and Didsbury, as we are just off the M60

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