NLP Life Coaching and Hypnotherapy

Posts tagged ‘habits’

The 5 Tips For Success That All Coaching Blogs Mention

The 5 Tips For Success That All Coaching Blogs Mention

 

 

As a Manchester Hypnotherapist and NLP Life Coach I am often found reading blogs on success, self-development, confidence, motivation and goal setting

 

I love developing my skills this way, but after I while I noticed that the key points to achieve success record on the blogs and websites had a commonality to them

 

There is a theme running through all the blog post I read and I have recorded the 5 Tips for Success that all coaching blogs cover

 

The better blogs cover 3-4 of these tips while others discuss one tip in detail. I have recorded all 5 tips in one blog for your use

 

 

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5 Tips For Success Tip 1; Change Your Beliefs  

 

People who don’t take action have limiting beliefs. When you hear people stating these beliefs, you will know that these people live in a limiting belief system – they let their limiting beliefs control them.

 

Peoples limiting beliefs include:

 

  • I always fail at everything I’ve tried
  • I will never be thin, I was built this way
  • I was born a nervous person
  • No-one likes me…ever
  • I’m a loser

 

We learn to rely on our limiting beliefs and we become experts in our habits created from our belief system. Remember at one time your habit wasn’t a habit, is was simply something you did once. A habit is a response or action you complete on a regular basis, this action becomes a habit when you perform it without thinking.

 

To find success challenge your limiting beliefs as this creates doubt in your belief systems.

 

  • What have your tried and succeeded in? 
  • When was the last time you lost weight?
  • Where are you when you are at your most confident? 
  • Who is your closet friend?
  • What are you doing when you are a winner? 

 

 

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5 Tips For Success Tip 2; Create a Focus

 

 

Whatever you focus on you feel.

 

We make the majority of our decisions emotionally. When wanting success, when confidence is required or when you work towards a goal you need to be in the right state. The emotional state you are in effects your perspective and it is this mixture of perspective and emotional state that changes your ability to take action

 

If you focus on failure you will feel like a failure – this state wont help you to take action

 

If you focus on eating unhealthy food, you will feel hungry, if you focus being nervous your confidence will drop, if you focus the hardness of the task you wont reach your goals.

 

Flip this around and think about being confident to feel confident, focus on your goals to create motivation, focus on enjoying exercise to inspire you to go for a run.

 

Once you start to focus on the pleasure of your goals, your positive emotional state and once you focus on achieving your goals you will feel a desire to take action

 

 

 

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5 Tips For Success Tip 3; Increase Your Water Intake

 

On the good blogs I read the author always states the positive reasons for drinking more water.

 

Rarely have I met someone who constantly drinks the recommended daily amount of water  for men is roughly about 13 cups (3 liters) per day. For women is about 9 cups (2.2 liters) per day. 55-75% of our body is water, if you don’t drink enough water you can end up with droopy skin, the inability to focus, dizziness, confusion, lack of strength and light-headedness –  this is not a productive state to be in

 

No matter what you want to achieve; increase in confidence, a big goal, boost in self esteem – you need to drink your recommended daily water intake – this sounds simple, but rarely is this achieved

 

When you drink water you will feel the benefits

 

  • better calorie control
  • more mussel fuel
  • productivity boost
  • feeling less fatigued
  • brain booster

 

 

5 Tips For Success Tip 4; Beat Stress With Exercise   

 

 

Yoour physiology creates or changes your state

 

Imagine being sad or stressed, when you are sad or stressed how do you hold yourself? Compare this to your posture when you are happy or confident?

 

Peoples hold themselves differently depending on there emotional state, if you change your posture you will change your state.

 

Exercise is a great stress release system. First exercise changes your posture which changes your state and secondly you turn your stress energy into a useful (exercise) energy. Also exercise changes your focus from the pain of the day to the exercise that you are completing

 

Everything I have read and researched about exercise is always highly positive

 

 

5 Tips For Success Tip 5; Reframe Your Negative Goal

 

People often set negative goals and don’t often realise that there goal is negative;

 

  • My goal is to lose weight
  • My goal is to get out of debt
  • My goal is never get nervous on stage again

 

Setting goals like these may seem fine, but the way the goal is phrased changes the emotional responses to the goal. The 3 examples have one thing on common, each goal is designed to move you away from pain “lose weight” “get out of debt” “never get nervous again”

 

When you focus on your goal you feel the associated emotional response. Negatively framed goals focus you on the negative, the pain, when you visualise this goal, you visualise the problem.

 

All really good goal setting blogs discuss this technique in detail; re-frame your negative goal

 

  • Lose weight becomes “My goal is to enjoy healthier food and to exercise more”
  • Get out of debt becomes “My goal is have a regular income that creates financial freedom”
  • Nervous on stage becomes “My goal is to feel highly confident when performing on stage”

 

When you read this newly reframed goal you will focus on the positive outcome, which creates a positive emotional state which in turn will help you to take action

 

 

 

 

Chris Delaney NLP Life Coach, Hypnotherapist and Career Advisor is available for booking for One to One Private Sessions, Group Training Sessions and Public Speaking Events

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Chris Delaney is also a published author “The 73 Rules of Influencing the Interview – using Psychology, NLP and Hypnotic Persuasion Techniques”

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Other People Who Read This Article Also Read:

Chris Delaney Specialise in:

FREE Life Coaching Downloads

Sponsored Adverts

Train to Be a life Coach and Make Money as a part time or full time Coach

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101 Life Coaching Tools and Techniques

101 coaching techniques

Chris Delaney NLP Life Coach, Hypnotherapist and Career Advisor is available for booking for One to One Private Sessions, Group Training Sessions and Public Speaking Events

Venues

DIDSBURY: 4 Birley Park, Didsbury, Manchester, M20 2TL

MANCHESTER: The Triangle, 37 Exchange Square, Manchester M4 3TR

E-MAIL: chrisdelaney7@gmail.com for more information

 

  • Hypnosis and Life Coaching for smoking in Didsbury
  • Hypnosis and Life Coaching for weight loss in Didsbury
  • Hypnosis and Life Coaching for fears and phobias in Didsbury
  • Hypnosis and Life Coaching for self esteem in Didsbury
  • Hypnosis and Life Coaching for anxiety in Didsbury
  • Hypnosis and Life Coaching for alcoholism in Didsbury
  • Hypnosis and Life Coaching for confidence in Didsbury
  • Hypnosis and Life Coaching for goals in Didsbury

Hypnotherapy and Life Coaching in Didsbury is easily located for people living in and around Stockport, Manchester, Tameside, Chorlton and Didsbury, as we are just off the M60

5 Steps To Take Control of Your Life

5 Steps To Take Control of Your Life 

 

Peoples belief systems control their life. At the extreme, if you truly believe you will die if you leave your house, your belief will make you Agoraphobic

 

If you believe you will always fail, you will never try anything new, you will never set goals and you never live up to your potential

 

Peoples experiences and back stories create strong believes that control you; you left the house once and was attacked. You set a goal and failed at the first hurdle.

 

These experiences and the stories we create at the unconscious level from our experiences, create our believes and your beliefs create your focus and focus creates emotion and it is this emotion that creates Pain or Pleasure  motivation for when you think about an action, goal or objective.

 

If you see a goal as pleasurable you will go for it, a pain perspective creates inactivity

 

 

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Take Control of Your Life Step 1 You Can Change Your Beliefs 

 

People have a belief “this is it” “I am who I am” and “I was born this way” When you hear people stating these beliefs, you will know that these people live in a limiting belief system – they let their limiting beliefs control them.

 

In actual fact humans cant stay the same – we constantly learn, change, improve and develop. Even with bad habits and limiting beliefs we learn and develop.

 

We learn to reply on our limiting beliefs and we become experts in our habits. Remember at one time your habit wasn’t a habit, is was simply something you did once. A habit is a response or action you complete on a regular basis, this action becomes a habit when you perform it without thinking.

 

To change your back story you first need to understand that you can change and develop. Recent research shows how new neurons are created when we respond differently to a stimulus – your brain physically changes when you break a pattern

 

 

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Take Control of Your Life Step 2 Recognize Your Story 

 

Recently I spent a weekend with my niece. She told me “when I grow up I will marry a prince, he will look after me and buy me nice things” 

 

We all learn stories when we are young. Our hunter and gatherer ancestors used stories, as we do today, to teach our children the rules of life, good and bad and how to behavior.

 

When your story becomes embedded into your belief system you will act accordingly to this belief and story. This is a good strategy for success unless your story is limiting your life.

 

Your success story and beliefs that work well for you could include:

  • “if you work hard you will progress in your career”
  • “studying increase knowledge” 
  • “if you fail to prepare, you prepare to fail”

 

If your back story is one that limits you, you will need to change the perspective of the story

  • “men/women will always let you down”
  • “to be successful in life you have to be rich”
  • “I have failed in everything I have tried”

 

When you focus on the negative, the bad experiences and your past limiting experiences you will, at the emotional level, feel negative.

 

If you change your focus you change your emotional state. This doesn’t mean that your past experiences didn’t happen, but it means you can change the perspective of the past experience

 

With a new perspective comes a new state

 

  • “men/women will always let you down” becomes “if I date people with the same values as me I will be happier in my relationship” 
  • “to be successful in life you have to be rich” becomes “success is measured by your happiness” 
  • “I have failed in everything I have tried” becomes “I learn from each and every experience” 

 

Read the first beliefs and ask how does this make you feel? Then, read the re-framed beliefs and notice the difference in state.

 

Once you change your beliefs and create a new set of rules to live by, you will feel that you are in control of your life and a feeling of control is a powerful state.

 

 

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Take Control of Your Life Step 3 What Makes You Happy

 

There may be one, two or many areas of your life that you need to change and you may be focused on these areas of development. But there are also areas of your life that you like. Maybe you have financial success, you have found your sole mate, your career is perfect, you feel healthy or have a close family

 

I don’t know what is going well for you in your life, what is the thing you enjoy about your life, what are you are proud off. Make a note of it.

 

Ask yourself “why does this area of my life make me happy?” 

 

When you think about this positive area of your life, does it fit in with your backstory and beliefs? Maybe your are happy in your job, you have “worked hard” and this has led to your “progressing in your career”

 

The positive beliefs we have and our values equal our own personal happiness. If you are ‘living’ these beliefs and values you will feel successful. You feel over the moon if you find your self in a situation that is above and beyond your expectations; a promotion you didn’t believe you would achieve 

 

If you live to your positive beliefs and values you feel good.

 

 

Take Control of Your Life Step 4 What Makes You Un-Happy

 

So, what parts of your life makes you stressed, makes you unhappy or makes you feel sad. Again, make a note of this.

 

Ask yourself “why does this area of my life make me unhappy or stressed?” 

 

Think about this area of your life – does it meet your beliefs and values? If your life is all about being healthy, you may not like your career, because the long hours you work, makes it hard to eat healthily.

 

Knowing what areas of your life you need to develop can be the key to motivating yourself to create change and many of you from completing the above exercise will feel motivated to make a change.

 

But one thing creates helplessness and that is the “feeling of NO control.”

 

Take Control of Your Life Step 4 Create Control 

 

If you feel helpless in your life, you may blame someone or something “It because of my childhood” “I was never given that lucky break” or “I never had the right teachers” Blame gives you an excuse for no control; the reason was X, if it wasn’t for X I would have Y.

 

No one likes the feeling of no control so we blame X to fulfill that feeling of a lack of control

 

If you hate the feeling of no control – TAKE CONTROL. If you are over weight, exercise. If you hate your job, find a new job. If have no money, find a strategy to make you rich. By taking action you take back the control, you will feel empowered and your motivation for creating change will increase

 

To take control of your life;

 

  1. How do you want to live your life – what is your purpose 
  2. Be-aware of the things you are doing that meet this purpose 
  3. Give yourself control by changing your limiting  beliefs and/or taking action to change your life 

 

Chris Delaney NLP Life Coach, Hypnotherapist and Career Advisor is available for booking for One to One Private Sessions, Group Training Sessions and Public Speaking Events

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Chris Delaney is also a published author “The 73 Rules of Influencing the Interview – using Psychology, NLP and Hypnotic Persuasion Techniques”

Book Cover

Other People Who Read This Article Also Read:

Chris Delaney Specialise in:

FREE Life Coaching Downloads

Sponsored Adverts

Train to Be a life Coach and Make Money as a part time or full time Coach

coaching business in a box

101 Life Coaching Tools and Techniques

101 coaching techniques

Chris Delaney NLP Life Coach, Hypnotherapist and Career Advisor is available for booking for One to One Private Sessions, Group Training Sessions and Public Speaking Events

Venues

DIDSBURY: 4 Birley Park, Didsbury, Manchester, M20 2TL

MANCHESTER: The Triangle, 37 Exchange Square, Manchester M4 3TR

E-MAIL: chrisdelaney7@gmail.com for more information

 

  • Hypnosis and Life Coaching for smoking in Didsbury
  • Hypnosis and Life Coaching for weight loss in Didsbury
  • Hypnosis and Life Coaching for fears and phobias in Didsbury
  • Hypnosis and Life Coaching for self esteem in Didsbury
  • Hypnosis and Life Coaching for anxiety in Didsbury
  • Hypnosis and Life Coaching for alcoholism in Didsbury
  • Hypnosis and Life Coaching for confidence in Didsbury
  • Hypnosis and Life Coaching for goals in Didsbury

Hypnotherapy and Life Coaching in Didsbury is easily located for people living in and around Stockport, Manchester, Tameside, Chorlton and Didsbury, as we are just off the M60

Habit Breaking Hypnosis in Manchester

Habit Breaking Hypnosis in Manchester

 

Nail biting, unconscious scratching, constant cleaning, eating chocolate, alcoholism, smoking, gambling, hair pulling are all examples of bad habits that people have. But how do habits form and how does hypnotherapy break habits?

Humans are creatures of habits. Our mind creates patterns and habits constantly to help us make faster unconscious decisions. You no longer have to think about “how to brush your teeth” your unconscious does it for you, allowing your conscious mind to focus on other things. We all have habits from brushing your teeth, the order of clothes you dress yourself in each morning, your response to flashing police lights, your thoughts when some says “dog” to your response to stress.

Your mind has an award system for some habits such as drinking, gambling and smoking your mind rewards this behaviour and releases positive chemicals that help reinforce the habit. A gambler as an example will feel the same emotional response when they nearly win a bet, as they do when they actually win a bet.

Most habits such as brushing your teeth, getting dressed or stopping at a traffic light are so ingrained that it’s hard to recognise that you in actual fact are playing out an unconscious pattern.

 

 

 

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Wide Spread Negative Patterns

Negative bad habits can spread to other parts of your life; The gambler on a losing streak may not pay the bills, which can result long term in becoming homeless. A client of mine always looked on the negative side of life, no matter what the situation was she would focus on what could possibly go wrong. This became limiting to her life and in the end she wouldn’t go on holiday, she stayed in a job she hated and even met up with people she new were bad for her, as the thought of finding new friends seemed to be filled with problems. She came to me, once she had let her problems get out of hand and was depressed and constantly stressed with her life.

Breaking Habits is Easy

 

A large number of clients who come for hypnotherapy for bad habits have several commonalities. A key commonality is their focus. Many will have an external focus; there focus is on the real world. This means the brain energy is spent on outside perspective rather then internally. When we focus internally our brain helps us sort out the millions of pieces of information we take in each day. We all need time to relax, to daydream, to meditate and to focus internally – a time to recharge our batteries.

To change patterns you need to understand your cue – the cue is the stimulus that causes the habit to happen. When you think about the habit you will often remember a particular event, image or movie. When we visualise something we will associate a feeling to this, smoking as an example may be associated with relaxing. By changing the emotional associated state you can change your response and your habit.

You can change the response to the cue so instead of associating relaxation with cigarettes you can associate disgust, once embedded the thought or seeing a cigarette will only produce the feeling of disgust, which will lead to you becoming a none smoker.

 

 

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Six Step Habit Breaking Process

1. Think of an unwanted habit you want to delete. Identify a Cue image for this situation that triggers the automatic response.What is it that you respond to? this thought may be represented as a large bright picture or movie.

2. Now imagine how you would be if you didn’t have this problem, if you were habit free. Ask – how do I want to react instead. See this new you and notice how you respond different to the stimulus or cue.

 

3. Enhance the detail and the quality (submodalities) of this resourceful image until the image is quite compelling; make it brighter, louder, turn up the volume etc

 

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4. Think about the original CUE image. In the corner of this image place the resourceful image, shrink it so it ends up around the size of a postal stamp (it will now be small and dark)

 

5. Now you want to make both images change simultaneously, so the large cue images becomes small and dark, and the resourceful image becomes big and bright. Say Swish as you do this. Repeat the swish around 10 times, between each swish make the frame go blank. Each time you swish, speed it up until you are swishing within a second.

 

6. Test to see if you can restore the old Cue picture, if you find it either won’t come back or the image is dark and dim, then the swish has worked (you should now only see the new picture and feel the new associated state). If not start repeat this exercise.

 

Chris Delaney NLP Life Coach, Hypnotherapist and Career Advisor is available for booking for One to One Private Sessions, Group Training Sessions and Public Speaking Events

 google_plus_logo1

Other People Who Read This Article Also Read:

Chris Delaney Specialise in:

FREE Life Coaching Downloads

Sponsored Adverts

Train to Be a life Coach and Make Money as a part time or full time Coach

coaching business in a box

101 Life Coaching Tools and Techniques

101 coaching techniques

Chris Delaney NLP Life Coach, Hypnotherapist and Career Advisor is available for booking for One to One Private Sessions, Group Training Sessions and Public Speaking Events

Venues

DIDSBURY: 4 Birley Park, Didsbury, Manchester, M20 2TL

MANCHESTER: The Triangle, 37 Exchange Square, Manchester M4 3TR

E-MAIL: chrisdelaney7@gmail.com for more information

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